Monday, September 6, 2010

On the Internet at Work

I have a lot of free time at work doing paperwork, partly because I don't get much to do and partly because I do the work too fast. I find a lot of interesting things out there, so I feel the need to share.

"Sweet, I didn't know that Obama actually met Hitler."
"They actually co-wrote a book, called "Mein Change." Sadly, it wasn't a darling of the critics."
"That's what Hitler said when the vending machine ate his money and wouldn't give him anything back."
 - I lol'd so hard at work.

"The lower class live paycheck to paycheck. Once they get money; they spend it. Any breaks to them will not equal more in their savings, but more into the economy. These are the guys who ejaculate 20 seconds into a handjob.
The middle class has slower-moving money that gets spent in the next 1-20 years on their kids education, a new house, or retirement. These guys are the average lovers, who can hold out for 10-20 minutes before shooting their cash-wad all over America's economy.
The upper class is the slowest, of course. Their children's children's children might be spending their money, and whatever money they get today goes into savings. Their businesses, however benefit most off of the lower class, who are feeding them with their quick money. The upper class is the old guy who can't come in under 4 hours unless they see something really kinky like a Ferrari or an exotic island, which will make them blow their load in under 10 seconds."

"Grammar is important. Capitalization is the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your uncle jack off a horse."

"I think of America as being analogous to the internet.
In theory, it is an entity born of tremendous potential for freedom of all kinds and liberty for all.
In practice, you've got the majority of people who are perfectly intelligent, yet appear to be in the extreme minority because of being drowned out by the loud-mouthed, fucking rednecks on one side and beset by burgeoning corporate interests on the other."


  1. mein change. i really loled about this. keep your good work up, bro!